This topic has been coming up a lot lately when working with our clients around trauma that a mentor or coach has experienced in the relationship with a client.
We hear the stories often about clients getting scammed or ripped off for not getting results, but what we do not hear very often is the fact that a lot of clients abuse the empathy and next-level service of a mentor with a heart of gold because they don’t take responsibility for their own shit.
If you’ve given a client the best care and world-class service while they are facing deep emotional wounds and old patterns, it’s likely that they project their issues onto you and expect you to save them from that pain.
The issue is always the same… they don’t want to feel the shame, grief, fear, guilt, not enough-ness, self-hatred, etc.
They’ve entered the coaching relationship with high hopes and probably based on a massive dopamine hit that your shiny marketing presented only to be faced with the reality that to expand, you must first go deep and face your shit to turn it into gold.
That kind of survival-based marketing is another topic that perpetuates this cycle and is seriously messed up. If you hate the way online marketing is mostly taught, there is a reason for that. But that’s another topic for a new day.
If you haven’t done your own work and continue to face every part of you, especially the most painful ones, you’ll attract clients who are not doing that work either. That’s when things get messy.
As soon as they face their own shit and project that onto you, you are confronted with your own and feel threatened in your safety.
Projections come with a lot of emotional baggage and confrontations such as rage, dissatisfaction, fight/flight/freeze survival-based triggers and a whole lot of other distortions.
If you haven’t faced your own shit and continue to work through your triggers, you’ll end up in a highly charged situation and get re-traumatized as well. Old wounds are being ripped open, your safety is being threatened, and the coaching relationship goes downhill.
Many “enlightened” coaches who bypass their own grief and emotional processing try to escape into their “heavenly” being like I call it or do mindset work instead of facing the raw and primal pain.
This subconsciously puts up a wall that repels any new person and client to enter their field. They want to visualize their way to financial success but subconsciously hate people because they feel deeply betrayed by the treatment from past clients.
Needless to say, that this is a recipe for disaster and the reason I always say that your mindset is usually not the reason you are not closing 100K+ deals.
I could draft entire books filled with these stories. I’ve also had many clients project their own pain onto me.
Because I always have and continue to do my own work and therefore graduated from a coach to a mentor, I embody a clear field of presence and don’t end up taking shit personally or getting triggered.
I instead give accurate and bespoke guidance to assist them in moving through those upheavals in the most graceful, raw and authentic way, and I clearly let them know how long the process of the subconscious dive usually lasts, which is how I know when they come out at the other end as an updated version of themselves.
I am happily and consciously walking at the edge of the human experience and the nothingness. Death and rebirth in every given moment is my commitment to showing up as a PIONEER and a cosmic dance that I show up for daily.
You can’t bypass evolution. It’s an organic unfolding that is unique to you.
But you can show up as the most authentic version of yourself throughout all of it.
I continue to say this…
the personal development space with the toxic spiritual bypassing and mind-hack bullshit has corrupted people’s natural ability to follow the pulse of creation. They are so caught up in their mind of how things are supposed to look like that the massive distortion and disconnection just continues.
With all the manifestation rituals that you see out there for the Lion’s Gate… pretty much most of them bypass this raw, primal and wild awakening at the root.
This is why we at PioneerU™ want to offer you (WOMEN ONLY) a different experience.
One that holds you deeply grounded and rooted in the earth while you physicalize your next-level version and how the physical manifestations of such looks without bypassing the primal processing of all the shit you must face first.
If this sounds like fun to you, we’d love for you to join us! Our next ceremony is upcoming on Sunday the 8/8 at 8 pm London time.
This is the New Moon in Leo – or called the Lions Gate. A lunation that encourages us to dream big and drop into the royalty as we go after what we desire without bypassing the primal aspect.
An excellent day to start projects and get laser-focused on your goals and not stop until you’ve accomplished them. But not with the hustle and grind and instead with laser-focused relaxation and presence while taking effective action at the highest level but with minimal effort.
This ceremony is perfect for you if:
-> You want to end a chapter and start a new one deeply grounded and embodied with massive wings to fly
-> You are claiming a financial goal that is at least 10X than what you are making right now
-> You are in a transition phase like ending a relationship, relocating or changing a business model
-> You want to use the energy of royalty and leadership in a grounded and powerful way that doesn’t bully any part of you but executes in a laser-focused relaxed way for maximum results with minimal effort in the shortest time possible
-> You have questions about a huge decision in your life that you need answers to now, and you trust that the earth has them for you
-> You want to connect with the primal force of the lion to move through trauma and release it from your nervous system with sound, breath, and body movements
I am very much looking forward to our ceremony and hope that you’ll join us inside the Pioneer Women Circle by clicking here to take part in it 💐
Tabita and the PioneerU™ Team